Late-Night Personalities Target Trump's Latest 'Gold Card' Residency Plan

Television's prominent comedians used the evening criticizing ex-President Donald Trump's just unveiled visa initiative, labeled the "golden visa," portraying it as a obvious pay-to-play scheme for the affluent.

Stephen Colbert's Pointed Analysis

Kicking off his broadcast, Stephen Colbert offered a sardonic Christmas tune targeting the commander-in-chief. "He is making a list, checking it twice, and then giving that list to the agents at ICE," he sang. "Trump ... spoils each thing he touches."

The subject was the controversial program that permits overseas individuals to purchase U.S. legal status for the price of a million dollars, with a "top-tier" version for 5 million. A government page guarantees approval "with unprecedented speed."

"A quick thought for you to rich foreigners: before you fork over the cash, have you considered Canada?" Colbert joked.

He pointed out that the card is also meant to "squeeze cash" from firms looking to hire skilled workers, requiring significant payments. "That's a lot of fees, however if you sign up, you also get a complimentary stay at a hotel of your selection – if it's the that one hotel," he said.

"The best screening the government has ever done," said Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "that $15,000 vetting to ensure these people absolutely meet the standard to be in America."

"That is important, you have to prove you're qualified to be an American," Colbert said dryly. "The initial query: how many burgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?"

Jimmy Kimmel's Scathing Roast

On his late-night program, Jimmy Kimmel referred to the visa program the "U.S. Access Express Card."

"This is a card that will permit affluent foreigners to live here," he stated. "For a million dollars, you get legal visitor status, you get a route to citizenship, and a presidential pardon for one significant crime of your selection."

"Maybe it's time to change that inscription on the Statue of Liberty – forget about your huddled masses. Hand over a million bucks, you're in!" he added.

Kimmel teased the lack of detail of the form, noting it is "tougher to start a Wordle account." He lamented that Trump "believes citizenship is something you can sell, like a timeshare."

"Indeed, the best people are the rich people," Kimmel joked. "That's what Jesus constantly said! Read it in the Bible. He says it's simpler for a camel to go through the eye of a needle provided that you give the needle a million dollars."

Seth Meyers discussing Affordability Concerns

On another network, Seth Meyers turned to Trump's declining poll ratings amid economic worries. "The public gave Donald Trump a second term because they were angry about the economy," he explained.

Recently, in a attempt to discuss prices, Trump conducted a briefing in front of a array of grocery items, where he reacted peculiarly to boxes of cereal.

"What a nice job, I think I'm going to take a few of them back to my cottage and have a lot of fun," Trump said. "Like the Cheerios, I haven't seen Cheerios in a long time."

"He is so incredibly weird," Meyers said. "Like, you're going to take them home to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What are you gonna do with those Cheerios?"

Meyers wrapped up by mocking conservative news defenses of Trump's financial record. "Maybe rather than complaining, you should give him a shiny trophy similar to the one FIFA did," he laughed.